28 December, 2011 20:34

December 28, 2011

I’m in a really bad mood today. I get irritated from the tiniest things. Patients here are divided between the nurses, so that each patient has two nurses who are more involved with their treatment. I have one male and one female nurse. I don’t mind the male nurse, but the female one just irritates me. The way she’s looking at me and the way she talks to me feels like she doesn’t like dealing with me. Like a waitress who hates her job not wanting to deal with customers. It’s probably in my head, but I can’t shake the feeling.

I wish I could get one night of good sleep. I keep waking up several times at night and when it’s breakfast time I’m really drowsy until I take my morning pill. It wakes me up but I still crave for sleep the entire day. The same way someone would crave for a snack even when not hungry. I wish I could get the same kind of sleeping pill I got the first night here. Now the only kind of pill they’ll give me is the kind that helps fall asleep. I have no trouble falling asleep, the problem is staying asleep. So I don’t bother even to ask.

I was planning to talk about this with my doctor today, but the meeting got rescheduled for tomorrow. I don’t like the doctor. She’s perky. And she asks leading questions. Instead of "How are you?", she asks "You’re doing good, aren’t you?" I notice answering yes before I even think about the question. Then it feels awkward to correct myself.

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